


Casting Couch Z

by Psyga315



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Casting Couch, Comedy, Couch Sex, Couches, Dubious Consent, Gen, Hilarity Ensues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:35:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22453516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Psyga315/pseuds/Psyga315
Summary: Yamcha buys a leather couch for which he and his friends can have sex on with people who seek stardom... However, his friends, being so battle-hardened that one even thinks sex is something you eat, fail to realize this. Hilarity ensues.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	Casting Couch Z

“What in the name of Yamoshi is this, Namekian?” Vegeta looked at the black leather couch alongside Piccolo.

“Yamcha said he was starting a new career in film making and bought this. I don’t know much about it myself, but he called it a casting couch.” Piccolo said.

“So, what? We use it to forge metals or whatever?” Vegeta asked.

“No… You ever watch a movie, Vegeta?” Piccolo asked.

“I _am_ a movie!” Vegeta raised his voice. Piccolo groaned.

“Well, seems actors land their roles by sitting on this couch. Possibly by reading their lines.” Piccolo said.

“Whatever it is, it sounds boring. Wake me when Kakarot puts all the universes in jeopardy again.” Vegeta walked out of the house just as Yamcha entered.

“Yo, you tried talking to-” Yamcha waved to Piccolo.

“You know him, if there’s no fight involved, he’s not having it.” Piccolo said before he glared at the couch again. “So… Why exactly is this couch so important?” Piccolo asked.

“Well, I’m glad you asked, my friend!” Yamcha wrapped his arm around Piccolo. “You see, people really _want_ to be put in movies. So much so that they’ll do _anything_!” There’s a pause before Yamcha spoke up again. “ _Anything_.” Yamcha squinted.

“So why sit them on the couch?” Piccolo asked.

“Because they can use the couch for… support.” Yamcha raised his eyebrow.

“I mean, I get the whole sitting down and line reading thing, but you’re implying that they’d do whatever you ask th- ooooooh.” Piccolo said.

“I know! Right?! This is going to be the best get laid quick scheme I’ve ever-” Piccolo immediately double-ax handled him onto the ground, resulting in him falling into the signature pose he always ends up in.

“That is so stupid! Who the hell would even fall for this!?” That’s when the door opened.

“Hey, I got the ad on Craigslist regarding auditions for a movie. Is this the place?” A woman with long blonde hair entered the house. The two gave pause before Yamcha got up.

“Well, now I gotta go get Advil. You keep her company, alright?” Yamcha said as he went to the kitchen. Piccolo blankly stared at the blonde-haired woman.

“Hey, I think I know you. Weren’t you that bad boy vampire from Buffay the Vampire Layer?” She asked.

“No.” Piccolo bluntly said.

“Well, you look like him… and… what’s with the makeup?” She asked.

“M-make up!?” Piccolo asked.

“Yeah, that’s soooo real!” She went over to feel his face.

“H-hey! Watch the face, lady!” Piccolo said.

“So… what roles are available?” She asked.

“That’s… a good question. Hey, Yamcha! What are the roles?” Piccolo said. Yamcha entered the room, messaging his forehead. He pulled in Piccolo for a whisper.

“Dude, just make something up.” Yamcha said. “Well, I’m going out. See ya!” Yamcha exited the house, leaving Piccolo alone with the woman.

Piccolo never had been intimate with anyone before, so it was a first to get laid… Even then, he had no idea how to go about it, especially since he’d be lying to her about getting a role. However, there was one thing that popped in his head.

“So… We have this role for a kid whose father was murdered by the very person who’s training him…”


End file.
